Southern Charm’s Craig Conover Just Wants to Touch Grass

Craig Conover, photographed by Marina Hunter.

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ALEX WEISS: I’m going to talk to you about gardening.

CRAIG CONOVER: I’m an open book.

WEISS: We saw your photo shoot. We love a sexy garden moment. 

CONOVER: That was so fun. I’m glad you liked it. I always think of when Will Ferrell did Buddy the Elf and they were like, “He had no idea how it was going to turn out. He just had to run around New York and do absurd shit.” I know it’s not that, but in the moment you’re like, “Am I going to look silly?” And you’re just like, “Screw it”.

WEISS: Yeah, you just gotta go for it. When you’re overly self-conscious, it shows. You looked like you were having a blast. 

CONOVER: Oh, good.

WEISS: So what is it about gardening?

CONOVER: What I’ve been told is that later in life—

WEISS: Yeah, you’re so old [laughs].

CONOVER: Well, as I’ve traveled and met so many different people through my speaking engagements and stuff, a lot of therapists have told me that I love the act of creation. It’s what really drives me. Gardening was the first time that I was able to explore that. I found out through the internet in sixth grade that you could just plant seeds and stuff would grow. As elementary as that sounds, it fascinated me. So I went in the backyard and dug a big six-by-eight plot and planted a bunch of stuff. Only radishes grew because I didn’t fill it with dirt and I had a bunch of sitting water. But my grandparents loved radishes, and so did my neighbors. So, I was able to harvest food that I grew and hand it out on the beach to my family. I had this really incredible feeling from it. Then my parents started to do potted tomatoes and peppers on the porch. And through my years of dating different people, I have introduced them to starting things from seed. I’ll lay this big canvas out in the living room and mix the dirt, and it’s really fun to share with someone. You can see them get hooked too, because it really is neat. So then I had home economics the next year, and I learned to cook and sew. I think it was a good escape from school when I was little. I was good at school and sports, but not good at the social part. I got bullied a lot growing up.

WEISS: You? That seems crazy.

CONOVER: I know, but it’s true, and it really shapes you. I was fortunate that I had really, really great parents. My mom was a school teacher and my dad owned a cleaning and construction company, but they let me explore my hobbies. Gardening was my first true escape. I’m extremely A.D.D., which explains my highly passionate hobbies.

WEISS: I totally get it. It makes sense what you’re saying about it feeling like an escape. Obviously, I’m a fan of the show, so I watched your sewing journey too. You like to create things!

CONOVER: Yeah, I’ve been fascinated with grounding recently. Not just theoretically, but also in real life—just touching grass. We’re filming right now, and it’s incredible, but one of the new girls, I tell her, “You have to touch grass every once in a while.” I love gardening, and I’m barefoot in my backyard all the time. I loved my chapters that I got to spend in New York City, but I went a while without touching the ground sometimes.

WEISS: I can’t even tell you the last time that I’ve been barefoot on the bare earth.

CONOVER: Right. I think I’m becoming a–what’s the word? Hipster? No, a hippie or something. I’ve always had a deep respect for nature. I grew up surfing and on the beach. And later in life, there’s nothing I like more than visiting my bees or seeing my butterflies and hummingbirds.

WEISS: You said you’re filming the new season right now. I think we saw a little bit of this last season too, but does that make the show more challenging? Like, you want to stay home and garden instead of going out. Has  that changed your relationships with your castmates even more than what we saw? And how do you navigate it while you’re filming the season?

CONOVER: I think for me, it highlights other people in my life’s relationship with themselves. I was very surprised by people’s reactions to it in my cast, and that’s the tough part. I found something that was healthy, that I really enjoyed. And a lot of my college friends understand it, and they get really interested in it. But life is fluid, and I think that’s hard for me to get used to. 

WEISS: The worst part about being an adult is that nothing stays the same.

CONOVER: No, it truly is. And you’re basically trying to feel okay that there aren’t going to be constants. You start to see your parents and friends get older. Now, I’m figuring out how to be happy on my own. I’m such a giver and a provider, and I love people so much, but it’s just my way of being by myself. And my activities are my happy place. I have bee suits at the house, but you can actually go out to the bees without your bee suit and let them land on your arm. I love sharing that with people. And I can judge someone by how they respond to elements in my backyard, really.

WEISS: Well, I mean, you’re saying that you’ve come  to the realization that everything is always changing and we have no control over it–nothing speaks to that more than nature.

CONOVER: That’s why you should trim your plants and steer them in the right direction! There’s so many metaphors in it.

WEISS: Everyone’s got to touch grass, for real. What’s the thing that you’re obsessed with growing right now? And what’s the best thing for someone to start with?

CONOVER: I have to have a purpose for everything, so I do that by having themed gardens. A salsa garden will always be my favorite thing. I’m now into a pizza garden.

WEISS: When you say salsa garden, you mean you’re growing everything you can to make salsa yourself?

CONOVER: Yeah. So you have tomatoes, cilantro, onions, and jalapeños. And then when you go out there, instead of just being like, “What am I ever going to do with all this?” you’re like, “I can make salsa.” I think a cocktail garden is really fun—growing different herbs that you can make cocktails with. You can do that on your windowsill. Planting pollinators is really fun because you’re going to start to see butterflies and hummingbirds and bees. Tomatoes and herbs will always be my first love—well, not first love, because radishes were—but I have several different varieties of tomatoes and herbs. And my sister-in-law doesn’t like green peppers, but then she eats one from my garden and she’s like, “Wait, this isn’t what they taste like.” So this year, I grew a ton of Roma tomatoes and herbs to make my own tomato sauce.

WEISS: Wait, do you coordinate what you’re doing in your garden with Sewing Down South? You’re like, “We’re going to do a salsa napkin line”?

CONOVER: It drives Amanda, one of my two partners, crazy because she always finds out at the tail end and she’s like, “Why didn’t you tell us?” But I think that’s because I don’t want to lose the authenticity of it. I worry too much about losing that. I did not want to make merch that said, “I’m a lawyer and a storyteller,” [laughs] but people now say it to me.

WEISS: Yeah and other people will do it. I literally walked into a store the other day and they were selling lighters with Interview’s Lana Del Rey cover. It makes us happy because it’s everywhere, but it’s also like… Shouldn’t we be the ones selling this?. And for you, it’s your words. It’s you.

CONOVER: No, it’s crazy to see it on merch that isn’t ours. I just got five gallons of honey on my first honey harvest and people are like, “Are you going to sell it?” And really, I’m going to gift it to a lot of the crew. We are going to do a gardening line, which is fun because I am very utility-focused. When I make stuff for the kitchen, it’s for me to use. And now we have spent the last six months designing things that will be fun, functional, and stylish for the garden. So, I do take advantage of it in that way. But I’ve built a relationship with people, and [having] my store is always the most humbling thing. When I do appearances, I always call them ahead of time like, “Is anyone there?” And they’re like, “Yes, Craig, people are here.” But if you get used to it, that’s when you stop appreciating it.

WEISS: For sure.

CONOVER: People legitimately feel like they have a relationship with us. I’m a big 90 Day Fiancé fan, and I was in Toronto at an airport checking my bag, and Angela from the franchise was next to me. I’ve spent years watching her [laughs], and I legitimately almost was like, “Oh, what’s up, Angela?” And then I had to remind myself, “You don’t actually know Angela, Craig.”

WEISS: Actual celebrities are obsessed with you guys too, so in some ways, reality stars are the most famous people in the world.

CONOVER: It’s a fun place. Danny McBride lives in Charleston, and he loves the show. And I’ll never forget, he came up to me and Cameran one time and was like, “Can I get a picture with you guys?” And me and Cameran were like, “Wait, what? We want a picture with you.” It is a weird feeling to know that there’s probably a couple people around you at all times that know intimate parts of your life. But I wouldn’t trade it. I think when I decided to do the show–it took about six months to sign for me and Cameran. Shep signed in five, I think. And ultimately, it came down to what would I regret more?

WEISS: Not doing it.

CONOVER: And wondering “what if” forever. There’s only maybe 200 or 300 people in America who have done the same job.

WEISS: My boyfriend is not a reality TV person, but he has seen so much Southern Charm and other Bravo stuff because I watch so much of it. There was some scene with you and Shep and Austin, and my boyfriend was like, “Why is Craig friends with these guys? They’re so mean to him.” And I was like, “But you don’t get it. They’re road dogs.” There’s so few people in this world who have gone through the insane experience that you guys have. It’s like going to war together.

CONOVER: Yeah, it’s a shared experience. Shep talks about it a lot now. It’s funny because Shep’s always a couple years behind me on observations [laughs]. Stuff that I used to say will become his big thing that he talks about now on the season. 

WEISS: In three years, he’s going to be all about grounding.

CONOVER: Yeah. He’s like, “Dude, there’s not many people that do this thing we do together and it’s so great.” I’m like, “I’m well aware of that.” [Laughs] Shep and I are in a great place, so it’s fun to do it together. It’s a unique way of being vulnerable because the only way you can really be around this long is to really just let people completely in and know you have zero control over their opinions or perspectives and you just have to be okay with that.

WEISS: But—see, now I’m your therapist—maybe gardening has helped you do that!

CONOVER: Yeah, it’s a control thing. No matter what happens, you will feel misunderstood at times. You don’t have a lot of control. And with gardening or beekeeping, you can give it your best shot.

WEISS: Yeah, you can keep trying. What is the sexiest thing to grow in a garden?

CONOVER: Ooh, that’s a great question. I think strawberries are really sexy. I’m thinking of the things that I use to flirt. I use my garden to flirt with people [laughs].

WEISS: How? 

CONOVER: So when we started filming this season, my strawberries were in bloom, and if I had a crush on a girl I would take her into my garden and pick a strawberry for her and have her try it. And then I have blackberries all over my fence line and blueberry bushes by them, so you go and pick some blueberries and blackberries. I think fruit is very sexy. If you can grow any type of fruit that you can pick off the plant and eat it right there, I think it’s an incredible way to flirt with someone. There’s something sexy about eating fruit. I don’t know why, but maybe we sexualized it.

WEISS: So your next girlfriend needs to be into fruit and gardening. What else?

CONOVER: Find entertainment in the things that I find entertaining. I think love languages fluctuate.

WEISS: What’s yours?

CONOVER: Words of affirmation are big, but I give with acts of service. I’ve realized I tend to date girls with dads that did a lot for them. I remember with Naomi, I would start her car in the morning and I thought that was the nicest thing in the entire world, but her dad did that for her growing up, so to her it wasn’t a big deal.

WEISS: Their bars are very high.

CONOVER: [Laughs] Yeah. Now, I think I’m quality time. I’m at a place where I’ve had so many experiences on my own that I’m really excited to travel with someone. I can find fun in anything, and I think that’s why I hated the ending of Into the Wild.

WEISS: Into the Wild?

CONOVER: Yes. I never read it, so I didn’t know he died. I was so mad at my friends for taking me [laughs]. But he was like, “An experience is only worth doing if it’s shared.” That’s the place I’m in now.

WEISS: Yeah. Well, do you have any gossip about the new season for me?

CONOVER: Season 11’s a monster season. Everyone’s going to be really excited. I haven’t felt like this in a couple years. You get to see a lot of new chapters in people’s lives and some fresh faces. Southern Charm fans will be really happy. Austin and I are opening a wedding venue in Charleston, even though we can’t stop fighting with each other all the time. It’s slightly more affordable than a lot of the places down here. It’s an all-in-one location, so you can do your ceremony, your reception, and your afterparty there. Maybe I’ll get my officiant’s license.

WEISS: Are you going to get married there?

CONOVER: Well, when I find the right person. I’m really excited to continue to challenge myself, and when the time is right, it’ll be right. I think that’s way easier said than done because I’m such a fixer. 

WEISS: Fix your garden, not your girl.

CONOVER: The plants don’t care if you have a messy week. They just want you to show up for them. I talk to myself enough during the day and now I talk to bees and plants too. The plants don’t judge you.