Kardashian Kountdown!

 

OUR RENDERING OF KIM’S BIG-DAY VERA LOOK—WITH PLENTY OF ROOM IN BACK.

Though Kim Kardashian may not have the most-anticipated wedding of the year, that doesn’t mean the pressure’s off; if she wanted the national spotlight on her upcoming nuptials to Kris Humphries, tomorrow was a wise choice of date. With the news cycle subject tolate-August doldrums, Kardashian’s three-month-long engagement has sparked plenty of headlines—enough, in fact, that we actually know a whole lot about the wedding before it’s even begun. But of course, there are plenty of mysteries, too—we’re sure to hear plenty over the weekend. And, with any luck for E!, maybe a few details will even stay secret all the way until their two-part primetime special on the wedding, due to air October 9 and 10.

Here, a handy breakdown of what we know about Kardashian’s wedding—and what we don’t.

The Dress
WHAT WE KNOW: Kim has chosen Vera Wang to design her dress; as of Wednesday, she hadn’t decided between three custom-made gowns, each theoretically costing up to $25,000—though not, of course, for her. There’s been some speculation that she’ll elect not to wear white, too. (We know you’re thinking of a joke, but it’s seemlier not to make it aloud.)
WHAT WE DON’T KNOW: Whether the gown she chooses will look more like Jennifer Lopez’s, Mariah Carey’s, Jessica Simpson’s, or Ivanka Trump’s—all wore Wang on their wedding days.

The Cake
WHAT WE KNOW: Kardashian and Humphries reportedly wanted to recreate the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge’s cake; at Kris Jenner’s behest, the 10-tier creation will be made of white cake with chocolate-chip frosting.
WHAT WE DON’T KNOW: Which poor starlets will be subject to poorly timed, badly angled gossip-rag photos of them stuffing their faces.

The Cost
WHAT WE KNOW: THR estimates the cost of the wedding could exceed a half-million dollars, even with all the products and services the couple will be receiving gratis; but Kris Jenner has already negotiated a $1.5 million deal with a weekly magazine (the Post says it’s People) for exclusive photos. E! could make almost $13 million in ad revenue during its two-part special, with elevated ad rates.
WHAT WE DON’T KNOW: How much money Kim Kardashian actually has.

The Registry
WHAT WE KNOW: Kardashian and Humphries are registered at Gearys of Beverly Hills, and their wish list includes Hermès dinnerware, Baccarat crystalware, and a $1,590 breakfast tray.
WHAT WE DON’T KNOW: Whether anyone ponied up $840 for a crystal ashtray—for a couple of non-smokers.

The Attire
WHAT WE KNOW: Kim’s bridesmaids will wear green, and she’s asked the non-bridal-party guests at the wedding to wear black and white.
WHAT WE DON’T KNOW: Whether guests who dare to disobey will be sent to Kris Jenner’s attic to watch the proceedings on closed-circuit TV with (fictional!) seventh Kardashian sibling, Klüga.

The Guest List
WHAT WE KNOW: Google Chairman Eric Schmidt’s estate will play host to 500 esteemed guests, including Justin Bieber, Serena and Venus Williams, Demi Lovato, and Kelly Osbourne.
WHAT WE DON’T KNOW: How our invitation got lost in the mail.

[NYP, People, THR, HuffPo, ABC]