R. Kelly Has Got Lots More in the Closet

We’re not prone to fits of hysterics, but the news of not one, not two, but thirty-two new chapters in R. Kelly’s legendary hip-hopera “Trapped in the Closet” has us popping open the New Year’s champagne a few weeks early and hunting down our Trapped in the Closet DVDs (What? Like you don’t have them).

For context, when we left Sylvester and company back in 2007, there was a series of phone calls concerning “the package” circulating between the characters. We don’t know what “the package” is (though we have some guesses), but Kelly promises us that we’ll discover what it truly is—and hopefully early on: this four-year cliffhanger is killing us.

Kelly tells TMZ that though the chapters are written and ready to be filmed, he needs the financial backing to make the videos which are, let’s face it, a good seventy percent of “Trapped in the Closet’s” appeal. Kelly, who also produced all of the videos in the saga, says the films “cost a lot of money to do . . . so we’re actually looking for investors.” Who’s the brave soul willing to manage the Kickstarter campaign?