We think Brit-it-girl, Kaya Scodelario, has the right mix of fragile beauty and darkness to portray Sasha the teenager, traipsing about Europe and studying at NYU.

Photo by Thomas Giddings

Rob is Sasha's best friend at NYU, the only one she trusts with her secrets. In our imaginary television show, Rob will be played by Franco the younger, Dave Franco.

Photo by Alasdair McLellan

If A Visit From the Goon Squad has a protagonist, it is Sasha. Formerly the assistant of record executive, Benny Salzar, Sasha has been swallowed up by New York and has a bit of a stealing-other-people's-possessions problem. We meet Sasha throughout her life—as a child, a university student, a 20-something, a mother. We nominate Emily Blunt to play a post-college Sasha.

In his lifetime, Bennie Salazar has been a punk-rock teenager, a high-powered record-label founder, and a troubled, middle-aged man. Perhaps Liev Schreiber could play Salazar.

Dolly was once a successful New York publicist known as La Doll. Everyone knew La Doll and wanted to work with her. Alas, La Doll's career (and life in general) falls apart when trays of boiling oil (party decorations) accidentally fall on and permanently disfigure many of the celebrity guests at one of La Doll's parties. Now Dolly only has a single remaining client, a genocide-responsible dictator, and is struggling to get by. All Dolly wants to do is reconnect with her daughter, who is trying her best to distance herself from Dolly and her notoriety. We think Lisa Kudrow could be a nice choice for the compassionate and unfortunate Dolly.

Kitty Jackson began as a beautiful young movie star, an 'it girl' par excellence, with the world at her fingertips, etc. Somewhere down the road, Jackson changed her course and isolated her fans. Now at 28, Kitty Jackson is but another "whatever happened to..." name. We choose Keira Knightley as our Ms. Jackson. (If you're nasty.)

Photo by Sam Taylor Wood